A lesson I want to pass on to you

When I was in Riverview doing stroke rehab a couple of guys came to see me.  One of them was from Thunder Bay and one used to live in Thunder Bay and a while back moved from there to this area.

About 15 years ago I had a falling out with the one that moved here.  I can’t even begin to describe the hatred I felt (the issue came to a head the day after my grandmother died – great timing).  And the hatred ran deeply and strongly all those years.

Around 1995 a friend and myself went on a trip that eventually found us in Minneapolis.  We were trying to find a puppy for for her mother (which we eventually did).  On the trip one of the things we talked about was forgiveness.  She talked about how she could forgive people for doing her wrong.  I told her how couldn’t do that.  They’d be on my bad side forever.  I don’t think she liked that style of thinking.  She was not that kind of girl.

Fast forward to the the day of the visit in rehab.  I was surprised to see the guy I had all the resent for there.  Then my mind went back to that conversation all those years ago about forgiveness and made me realize that he came to visit me during the lowest point in my life… as a friend.  In that instant a lot happened. That conversation all those years ago suddenly made sense from her point of view.  I decided right there and then that life is too short to carry grudges, especially with someone you used call ‘friend’.  As far as I was concerned all was forgiven.

So we spent a couple of hours talking about old times and remembering a lot of the things we did together in Thunder Bay (we did a lot of stupid things).  The visit by friends I hadn’t seen in about 15 years was probably the visit I treasure the most while in the hospital.  Thanks for that, Doug and Cory.

And thanks to Donna for teaching me that I can forgive.   It took a long time for the lesson to sink in but sometimes I can be that way.

Now I want to pass that advice on to you, my friends.  There are going to be people you meet in life that you know you won’t ever like but will have deal with.  Try to deal with them as best you can and then go on with life.  But if it’s someone close to you, work it out.  You’ll be happy you did.  Sometimes that may not be possible, but time is a great cure for a lot of things so maybe it’s time to try.

And one last word for Doug and Cory… “peaches”

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One thought on “A lesson I want to pass on to you

  1. Great lesson!
    Carrying that kind of bitterness just feels awful.
    Really love reading this blog, I admire your openness and honesty.
    We may have to connect for an Arby’s roast beef soon!

    Like

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